Erika’s 2020

Midnight was a letdown.

Let go of someone. Whispered to someone else leaving for the airport at 4am that I was in love with them. Cried in therapy. Cried in bed. Cooked a lot. Closed a store. Freed a butterfly. Found my favourite pen. Read too many books on trauma. Missed my nanna. Made a pillow fort. Made a brand new (old friend). Said goodbye to him again. Drank many wines. Took many photos of clouds. Conceded to watching some television. Decided to try and trust myself. Considered repeating the year, staying 31. Regrettably attempted a puzzle. Regrettably attempted to make bread. Said I’d never do workouts at home. Still doing workouts at home. Attempted to play the piano for a minute. Wrote a lot. Many friends had babies. Tried to grow vegetables in my apartment. Bought more couches. Started snacking on capsicum. Bought some art. Didn’t buy a dog. Again. Had many a zoom. Got to know my little self. Forgot about my big self. Took a lot of photos in lingerie. Stopped washing my hair. Dropped some stories. Reminded myself to be better. Dance for 9 hours in a row. Grew a brand up a little. Grew up myself a little. Tried mushrooms for the first time. Questioned love many times.