The Longest Relationship I’ve Ever Had

I’ve had a relationship with makeup for as long as my brain will allow me to remember.

I was younger than 5 when I was gifted my first lip gloss. Followed by a million others. Followed by a sparkly blue roll-on eye shadow that gave me an eye infection.

Which pink lip gloss should I wear today? 

Makeup used to be shiny and new. But then I was older. Cover your pimples. Conceal your dark circles. Fill your pores. Are these not human features?

These people and places aren’t listening to the words coming out of my mouth. I may as well be from Venus. I left these places looking like somebody that wasn’t me. They just want your pocket money.

I thought I was still in a healthy relationship. I was morphing into what the people and places wanted me to be. I paid them to hide my insecurities that they created.

Then I went to a school that taught me how to put makeup on faces that aren’t my own. I learned so much but there were too many rules. Like a colour by number. 

Rules and I don’t like each other very much.

After that I became one of the people at the places that takes your pocket money. I showed up to the place every day looking like one of the people. The place told me to wear more makeup which made me want to wear less. 

I fell out of the brainwash.

The place didn’t like that. So I said bye-bye.

I muted the beauty industry and remembered how to like me. I will wear as much or and little makeup as I like and still love me in every shiny surface when it’s all gone.