The urge to spend

By Lauren Payne , March 15, 2022

Read time: 3 Mins

The urge to spend Image

Where has this sudden compulsion to spend come from? For months now I’ve been spending so much money on clothes. I’ve been buying everything from swimmers, to tops and skirts… and I just have no idea why. I’ve never spent this much in such a short space of time. I’ve always been one to pace myself with one new piece every couple of weeks, not adding six things to my cart every second day. 

Everything I’ve bought so far has fitted me wonderfully and I’ve felt beautiful in them, but I have no idea what’s urging me to spend money on how I look so frequently. 

Is it because I’m feeling more confident in my body and comfortable showing more skin? Am I feeling sexier than I ever have before and want to embrace this newfound sexiness with more fitted pieces?

Has this sudden urge to spend come from the anticipation of moving to a state with a significantly warmer climate? Knowing full well the clothes I currently own better serve cooler temperatures? 

Am I wanting to spend because I’ve been introduced to a series of new local fashion designers who create unique pieces using sustainable practices? 

Do I spend because I want to support these designers and their values? Or am I gladly buying these pieces to add one-of-a-kind designs to my wardrobe in collaboration with these designers, building new relationships along the way? 

Or am I happy to spend my hard-earned cash on clothes because I’m evolving as a person and want clothing that reflects who I’m becoming? 

I want to hide myself less and fully embrace who I am, what I’m interested in and where my talents lay. I want to show the world the most incredible facets of myself and stand out from the crowd, rather than blend into it. Is this why I’m so willing to spend money on the things I use to express myself to the people on this planet?

Honestly, the answer to all these questions is yes. 

I’ve entered a new season of my life and instead of standing on the side-lines as the best friend, I want to be the main character. I’m releasing the idea that I’m here to support people and instead, I want to support myself.

I want to be the main character, so I’ve chosen to dress like the main character. 

I’ve decided to scrap the oversized tops I wore to hide my arms and replace them with cropped singlets. The maxi skirts I once thought made me look short, now fill my shelves, because I’ve found patterns I love and that make me feel stunning. I’m embracing boob tubes, halter tops and V-necks for the first time because I feel confident enough in myself to wear them. 

I’m transforming into a new version of myself, and my clothes are transforming with me.

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