afforded by Carrie Bradshaw’s steady bouts of uncontrollable ’wonder’ are often well received by Sex and the City’s audience. However, in episode ‘Evolution’, I must say I am disappointed by Carrie’s tactics. I mean, recruiting her personal belongings as emotional emissaries to be installed inside her boyfriend’s apartment so that every time he sees something she has strategically introduced into his physical space, he is forced to think of her?
Genius.
But a mini hair dryer? A travel size bottle of Clinique makeup remover? I’m sure Carrie can do better than that.
I am a child of divorce, so I know how she feels. It’s hard work determining, through a careful process of trial and error, which personal grooming products are integral in preserving the integrity of a signature look so that your Dior kidney bag weighs down your shoulder as little as possible whilst transporting your life from one house to the other, partly because your physical possessions are your only way of maintaining a sense of stability in the wake of a broken home and it’s not like your Daddy is going to understand your need for actual shampoo and conditioner instead of the 1 liter home- brand 2 in one. I get it. And if Carrie wants to keep some things at her bf’s house for the sake of convenience, she may as well use them to expand her territory. You know what they say, all body parts are fair in love and war if you are left without tinted moisturiser or bronzer.
Unfortunately, stray cosmetics were never going to blow Mr Big’s commitment-phobic wall to smithereens. That is because in this situation, men will only respond to items they can use themselves or that can give them a boner. If you want to achieve total domestic domination you have to leave things that keep their interest; things that they can’t help but embrace at full capacity. This is the best way to lull them into a false sense of safety under the guise of generosity when in reality you are setting up emotional land mines ready to go off, should you ever be jilted. If you don’t keep this in mind, your items will be given straight back just as Mr Big gives Carrie her things back in a Barney’s New York bag. You want something to remind him of your existence when you are a couple, but can also continue their garrison long after you break up.
We all know what the road to hell is paved with, and good intentions are known to have the texture of gravel. Your boyfriend will need some reliable footwear. Like some R.M Williams. Shoes like those are meant to last 20+ years and if your relationship doesn’t hold up as well as good quality leather then he’ll have plenty of time to think about you every time he puts them on.
